Why do I gamble?
If gambling has stopped being fun for you and started to feel like a problem, you may have found yourself asking "Why do I gamble?"
Do I need to give up gambling?
Some people who are problem gamblers can return to a controlled level of gambling. However, most people prefer to abstain, or give up gambling for good. There are no rules for determining whether you should reduce or stop your gambling. Generally if you're losing more money than you can afford, accumulating debts, suffering mentally, physically, and/or socially, giving up may be your best option.
People gamble for lots of different reasons and sometimes those reasons change. You might gamble regularly at the TAB ‘to win money' but join the Melbourne Cup sweep in your office ‘to be sociable'. You might usually play the pokies alone but share a machine when you go out with family and friends. Understanding why you gamble can help you change your behaviour.
Why you gamble
Check this list below or write your own list
- To win money
- For entertainment
- To be sociable
- To make a big win
- To forget troubles
- To escape from problems
- For something to do
- For excitement
- To avoid talking to people
As well as all these reasons, people may gamble as a habit. The reasons they started have been forgotten and the habit just goes on. You can take steps to break the habit.
How to cut back
Tell others about your decision
It is easier to stick to decisions if you tell other people about them. Why not start by telling someone important to you that you are going to try to cut back on your gambling? Remember, you need to choose carefully and talk to people you can trust when looking for the support of others.Set limits and stick to a budget
You need to decide how much money you want to spend (that means ‘risk losing') on gambling each week. Think of it as entertainment money, not an investment. If you choose to spend $20 at the TAB or on the poker machines, spend only that amount. If you win, do not add the winnings to your initial stake - spend it another way. If you have debts, then include regular repayments of these as part of your budget. Set repayments as low as you can so you don't end up really short of money - that could just add pressure and make you want to gamble more.
Write your own gambling diary
A gambling diary helps you to be honest with yourself about how often you gamble and how much you lose. Keeping a diary can help you develop self-awareness and change your behaviour. Remember, you do not have to gamble everyday or lose money every session to have an issue with your gambling.
By identifying the thoughts, feelings and situations that occur before and during a gambling session, you can start to understand the causes of gambling. This knowledge is important if you are going to break your gambling habit as it will tell you exactly what triggers each episode.
You can use the information in your diary to weigh up the pros and cons of your gambling.
Get your thinking straight
Problem gamblers often end up with some pretty strange ways of thinking about how much they lose and how skilful they are at gambling. Often gamblers have no idea how much they win or lose in the long term but they believe they are in front.
The only way a gambler can be sure that he or she is thinking straight when they say ‘I'm ahead' is if their diary records actually add up to a profit. Otherwise, you must assume that you are behind and make sure your thinking fits the facts.
When you start to make changes to your gambling habits, say good things to yourself. This may seem silly but what we say to ourselves is really important. It helps you change old habits.
Rate this page
Comments Disclaimer
You're now in the public comments section of this page. Please do NOT post personal questions for Gambler's Help service professionals as they do not moderate or reply to questions here. This content comes from other people visiting the site and cannot be vouched for. Also please do NOT give feedback on the site here. A reminder: By using this Web site you are accepting the terms of the Department of Justice Privacy statement.
Comments
My husband had a problem gambling. It started off as just putting twenty dollars thru the pokies. After winning about a hundred dollars, he thought that the more you played with the more he would win. It didn't work out that way. Without my knowledge he gambled away our son's education money and all the money we had saved. I was furious. I gave him the option of never gambling again or moving out of the marital home. He hasn't played the pokies for eight months. Gambling is a huge problem for some people and it breaks families apart. I consider myself lucky that we didn't end up in debt that we wouldn't have been able to repay. Some families lose everything.
I worked as a bartender for twenty years. When pokies were introduced at pubs and clubs, it seemed like harmless fun for the patrons.
The longer I worked in the bar the more I witnessed pokie addiction first hand.
Pension day was the worst. I have witnessed single mothers with babies in prams putting all their money thru the machines, leaving no money for nappies or food. Week in and week out, people gambling their wages away in just a few hours. Husbands going home to their families after gambling away their pay for that week.
There were many times that I wanted to say something to these people but it was against the rules. I would've lost my job if I said anything to the problem gamblers.
I believe that pokies should be banned from clubs and pubs and only available at the casino. I know that this would not stop gambling addicts but it makes gambling less accessable
I have been a problem gambler for the last 10 years. It started out as 20 dollars here and there. Over years it has progressed to the point where i loose the $1000 card cash out maximum every visit. Even when i win (wich is rarely) i will feed it back in and leave with nothing, winning now only extends the duration i stay at the venue. If it is a chq payout it only ensures i will be back in 3 days when it clears. I know when i walk in now that i WILL loose $1000 and yet i still slip up now and then. Even when i accepted i have a problem i still gambled. The best advice i can give is make yourself accountable to family/loved ones. Admit your problem, be transparent and take steps to have you money channeled into an account you can not easily draw upon and can be monitored by a trusted partner. (At one point i was even doing internet banking form the laptop in the car so i could get more funds) I have come clean to my partner and had my wages going into a joint acocunt that i only have debit card access to (no pin). I have still slipped up now and then but im gambling much much less. You need to overcome te shame of admitting your problem to others, and your well on the way to recovery.
today i have decided to give up gambling for good. my gambling has not effected anyone yet as i am only young and do it out of boredom as well as a fear of social interaction. it has taken some time to admit i have problem with my addiction but i feel now it is the time to end my problem gambling. i never gambled until i had nothing left but i can only imagine the life i could be leading without losing the amount i have on my addiction. my major problem is letting myself get carried away in my gambling without the fear of the losses. i have never hit rock bottom to make myself aware of my problem but i think i can finally admit to the fact that i have ignored over the years the amount of money i have been wasting. i can only hope that through my decision to give up my gambling that i can help other people that i know to follow my path and regain control of their lives. writing this all down is my first step and i can begin to take back the portion of my life that i have lost to my addiction.
Gambling is a waste of time. Gambling is bad money that nothing good will ever come from it. You win you go back, you loose you go back, so where does it stop....STOP NOW....believe me its not worth the time, frusfration the anxiety suffered from it. There is no point so quit now and have my policy $0 gambling policy they are all evil and its there to introduce misery in your life. Life is hard enough as it is to worry about gambling....whar a waste of valuable time and hard earnt money.
My partner has a gambling problem and he doesn't know that I know. The gambling started out of boredom as he had been injured at work and had nothing to do during his recovery. He bets on the horse race - both the horses and the jockeys. At first he was winning and the winnings soon tallied a couple of thousand dollars which was great, but naturally didn't last. Those initial wins were all he needed to get the taste. He tried to involve me as well. At first it was fun but things soon soured. I found that I was unable to justify betting hundreds of dollars and tried to set low limits for both of us. He went along with this at first but soon started gambling much more than he'd admit too. I have asked him a couple of times about money that's mysteriously gone missing and he becomes very defensive. I'm worried that when I tell him that I know he has a problem he will flip out, but it has to be done. This website has been a great source of information and helpful advice, so now I'm better equipped to deal with this problem. Wish me luck!
i can totally agree with all these people on here, its a disease and the worst thing i can think of is for some social gambler to win on their first time because then you are hooked... i used to see people win here and there and go back to that venue only to see them 100 times worse off then when i had seen them last, and i think to myself gee they have gotten bad... but now i think i wonder what i look like.. the worst thing is when you lie about where the money has gone like oh they stuffed my pay up at work i have to wait till the next pay cycle or that company called me i had to pay that bill immediately... there are only so many excuses you can come up with, i still am gambling but its no where near as it used to be the feeling of walknig out with no money for food or rent makes you feel physically sick and the look of my gf when i feed her another bs story rips my heart out, the people you hurt are the ones that are around you that bail you out over and over again..
I am a father of two and third one coming soon. Well, back in the uni days, i used to play a bit and then after i got married, i stopped. I was a problem for me when i was younger and it was like all the money i have made, straight to casio. i have won large amount of money but i think i have lost much more. My bad habbit is comming back a bit am i am scared that i might loose everything again. when i was single, it was only money. But htis time, it will cost my family and our shelter for the kids as well. I have decided not to gamble again and will only carry enough cash for the day and leav all my key-cards and credit cards at home.
I think it as bad as drugs, perhaps worse since it will destry everything around us.
i have gambled since i was 15 years old. it started when my cousine introduced me to the horses,i stared better $2.00 exactas and now on pay day i lose the whole 600 within 30 minutes. i am so bad that this week my brother gave me 700 to hold and i gambled that to :( i have tried so hard to stop but i always end up back. the worst thing about it is that you are willing to go with any money regardless of who's it is. i now have to explain to my brother where it went. gambling has mace a big impact on my life. i have worked full time for 6 years and i have nothing accept for a crappy car. i i no longer sociolise with mates, all my mates are gamblers and none of them can face the facts. some times i feel that i'm delusional going in there thinking i'm going to win or i'm only going to spend 50. it never works like that for me. i hope after rading facts on this website i can not gamble no longer. good luck people please dont put yourself in my position
I was hooked on the pokies for 3 1/2 years. I was in my 40's when I started playing and had gambled responsibly since I was 18. I never overspent before. I never gambled daily or when money was tight. But within weeks of starting to play the pokies, I was hooked and within 2 months was gambling daily on the pokies. I can't accept that getting hooked on the pokies was related to a failure on my part to control my impulses, because I have an addictive or avoidant personality or even an unconscious desire to destroy myself. If these explainations were valid, then I would have become a problem gambler 22 years before I did. There is something about pokies that is particularly addictive. They aren't safe for up to 10% of people who use them. They should be banned altogether or (at the very least) allowed only in a casino.
I have been a playing pokies for 4 years now, it started with my husband telling me to have a go with 10 dollars and I used to say "what a waste of money, I can buy a drink with that". One night I did sit with him and pressed the button which won 200 dollars. Every time we went out I had to have a go, eventually it was never about the money you win, its about if you can get the symbols to match. He can go and spend 50 bucks on them and I will spend 2 grand easily a night, we have children and never have gotten to the point of having no food in the house or money to spend the next day but we havent been able to get money out because of withdrawl exceed limits. I know gambling is bad but its so hard to stop. Hopefully this website will help me!!!!
Im an international student studyin in Aus, being in a city where casino is easily accessible i became addicted 2 the game blackjck in a local casino. ive only been playin 4 few months yt i certainly am sure im addicted to it as it has cost me one semester course fee, which is alot, n i had to cheat 4 my parents 2 send another large sum of money to cover my living n sch expenses. it was scary lookin at how much i cud bet in one hand. tho i hvent been gng there for a while bt couple of days back i tried my luck again becoz it was mah birthday, i knw it was stupid n again i lost few hundred bucks there. nw im so upset, thinkin of so much thng i can do with d money i lost, bt ive come to realise tat d money has bought me a huge lesson. im so ready to quit n nt being stupid anymore. i presume most ppl gamble or turn into compulsive gambler becoz they think they can make quick n easy money. it really will nvr happen. life's nt that easy. i knw there's alot of oversea students like me get stuck between study n gamble becoz we're newly exposed 2 this entertainmen. today i hope any1 like me who's studyin oversea shud nvr try gamblin, and stop. even if u did n it already has done certain damages to u financially, dnt worry coz money is nt everythin, just b smart from today, study n work hard for future, rmb we're still young. keep safe beings. ur winner when not gamblin.
I am a big pokie addict and its getting to the point where i will have to declare bankrupt soon. I just keep getting myself furthur into dept every week. I have lied to my partner and my family and have come up with every excuse to get hold of money. I gamble easily $1000 everytime I play. I would put in more money if the bank would allow me to draw more. I have capped out credit cards and even over drawn my account by $2500. I win sometimes but always put it back in. Its like I can,t leave the pokies until my wallet is empty. I hate myself for what I am doing and always say I will never play them again but I am weak. I have added up my depts so far and I owe over 30,000 dollars to family, friends, credit cards and overdrafts. I don,t even earn that much money in a year. I am seriosly going to try and stop playing them and my first step is to tell my family of my problem. They know I play the pokies but don,t know how bad. I have recently lost my partner because of my addiction and I don,t blame him for leaving. I would blow all his pay as well when he gave it me to pay bills.
I started gambling with intent at the age of 18. My mate and I would take $20 to the casino and put it on black or red on the roulette wheel. We would leave if we won or lost. That progressed swiftly to the black jack table where i would stake $200. I would leave if i doubled my money but invaribley i would lose. Then came the pokies. They are the mose corruptable, temptabele evil machines that will rip every penny off you. I remember getting the 5 hearts one day and that was it. A $200 winner has turned me inot a $50,000 loser. I've been gambling solidly for the last 15 years and have nothing but debt to show for it. I am delusional and lie to myself and others about gambling and money. I have worked the entire time with nothing to show for it. I will only bet $50 on the way home and that's it. Why I why do I listen to myself. I've progressed to $5 presses whenever because anything less doesn't give me a buzz but boy does the money fly out the door. Credit card transfers and a daily $2000 limit and i can easily lose $1000 $2000 at a sitting. Sometimes it only takes an hour or two to blow that much cash. Most of the time you hate even betting the last $100 or $200. It makes you sick to put anymore money through but your resent everything and wack it in, you're thinking to yourself F everything. I really want to stop but don't know how. I can go through phases where I don't go for a while but I always end up back there.
It starts out with playing pokies because of loneliness issues due to separation then it gets to the point where losses starts happening and despite advertising saying ' Do not chase losses" then it goes to sports betting and the occasional horse betting then more losses -hard to stop because the losses are always in the back of your mind - it is the first thing you think of when you wake up - the final result is more tears
- keep a diary - is good advise - in my case too many small bets to write them down and you lose track of your losses - I know i will stop soon and cut my losses which happen to be in many tens of thousands of dollars- I think of my kids who live with their mother and who work for $15 hour it is really a shakesperian tragedy -
I too am a regular gambler. Like many others it was first the odd $50 but after a while it turned into alot more. I wish I was never introduced to gambling or the casino as I remember the days when I never felt the urge to gamble and how happy I use to be. I know gambling has made me a lonely, greedy and selfish person who is looked down upon by my peers. Its truely a curse and has cost me more than just a lot of money and self respect. I advise anyone that has never gamble to never try or anyone currently gambling to think of the consequences. Like another poster pointed out theres no such thing as easy money.
Well, Ive just blown £1700 knowing full well a. I cant afford it b. I knew I was going to lose before I put it on (as i always lose!)
Ive gambled over 20 years, lost tens of 1000's yet keep going! its madness - Is it really that exciting - no!
Its pure running away - its a drug! when i lose the money, im forced to stop, and guess what, suddenly things start improving!
WE ALL NEED TO WAKE UP - DO EVERYTHING IN OUR POWERS TO PREVENT GETTING MONEY!
OTHERWISE WE'LL BE OLD AND JUST EXAMPLES OF WASTED LIVES!
xxxx
I am in my late 20s and have always had an interest in gambling since I was young. I would always be keen to have a punt at the horses or go down to the casino and play roulette. Recently I moved into an area where there are pokies in nearly ever pub. I have always had an addicitie personality (heavy drinker, former smoker) and so it really is no surpsie I have become addicted to pokies. I had a couple of decent wins early on, but I have had so many more loses that I don't even expect to win anymore. It is just about the thrill of hitting the 3 feature icons to trigger those free games that does it. I have hidden my gambling from my girlfriend, and only recently let her know of a loss. I am now blowing $500+ a week on pokies and, although I am not broke, I feel sick knowing what that money could have been spent on. I have put withdrawal limits on my cards of $200 a day, but I keep finding ways to get more out. I wish I had the strength to be honest with my girlfriend about what is going on, get help and fix myself. But I am too proud and feel I need to fight this battle alone. Anyone out there - don't gamble on pokies unless you do it once in a blue moon for a small amount. They are a sickness that is spreading in society and ruining lives.
I have been bacarrat for 15 years since casinos were introduced in all cities. The gambling got real bad in the last 10 years. I earn $90k/yr gross and would blow $2k a week playing bacarrat. I would lose interest in my public service job (20 years in same job) and skip work just to play. I would have lost $200k-$300k over the last 10 years. I inherited a lot of money and have blown most of it gambling. I have stopped playing now for 2 years after a lot of counselling and now realise that gambling is never recreational. I am getting back on my feet and feel so much better without gambling. Thanks to all campaigns against gambling, i am now no longer addicted.
With lots of help and support I have managed to take control of my life again, but not until things got very, very bad and there was a real risk of losing EVERYTHING, including having thoughts of ending my life as a way of putting an end to all the pain I was feeling and causing others.
There is a light at the end of the tunnel for anyone who feels like they are caught in a never ending spiral of gambling addiction.
Gamblers Help was of great assistance to me (thank you for all your help, guidance and understanding)
Interesting to see some peoples points of view. Its not that hard hey. Take up boxing or something. This is a great way to get out aggression and negative energy which i think is one very strong reason some 'compulsive gamblers' do it. Almost like a vent for frustrations/dissapointments etc. You just need to replace it with something positive really-i guess in some ways similar to quitting smoking, although this is largely a physical addiction also.
It's surprising to me, the method of gambling some folks choose. If it's because of boredom or for a release, why wouldnt the individual learn how to play poker. It's pretty much proven that poker is the only 'real possible' way of winning long term anyway!! And thats if you know what you're doing.
Understandably, we are only human and the pressures of day to day life can be difficult to deal with at times. I think we all have some kind of weakness. I am convinced that the way to deal with addictions is to exercise, exercise, exercise. Not only does it release natural feel good chemicals and increase seratonin levels(which many compulsive gamblers have shown to have decreased levels), it is completely good for you and releases stress big time!
Anyway, thx for my 10cents worth. Good luck all!
I'm not without fault and at times have bet more than I should have and do like a few $5 EW bets on the horses on a Saturday.
My Lady has been overspending at pokies for a long time now, sure she wins on occassion sometimes even large amounts, but she then mostly puts it all back in because she says it's free money.
How can it be free money when I've had to bail her out for morgage payments and at times get told to wait in the car while she finishes playing.
It's even at the stage now where she makes a fight to use as an excuse to leave the house and go to the pokies. It somehow even gets twisted around and she claims it's my fault, if I try to stop or moderate her habit I'm accused of being a control freak.
At first it was occasionnal now it seems to be almost every night of the week.
I love the lady I first meet but fear I may have already lost her! Even if it stopped today it has perminently scared our relationship and affected the way I think about her. She is at the pokies again as I write this and I am home alone after midnight!
I am 24 years old and I gamble. Mainly horses,but sometimes on wheel of fortune on the machine at my local bookies.
I think for me personally. its more about the buzz of winning than the actual money won. I have noticed that many gamblers even if regularly successful do not spend money on the trappings of wealth ie clothes, cars, jewellery when they can. Its more about your judgement being validated by the bookie/friend/guy you beat at something etc.
I was introduced in a harmless way when my stepdad would take me and my sister to the bookies at about 12noon on saturdays. we would stand in the corner quietly and they didnt seem to mind. My mum would let us pick a horse each from the form guide in the paper on big racedays like the Grand National and put a small amount on for us. I do not see my gambling as a problem because I discipline myself to only put what I can afford each day. I usually do placepot bets on horses most days for £1-2 because you can get a big payout. I walk out of the shop when i've picked my horses and check results on teletext later that evening.
My mother has lost over $100k in pokies and she is denial about her problem.
I have been gambling on and off all of my adult life, i'm now 33.
Ever since i was young and my father would stay out late at the casino i would wonder where this magical place was that he was going to and wonder what it was like. As soon as i hit 18 i was there, and ever since i have been hooked on pokies in particular and have gone through every concievable emotion associated with losing my pay, my spare money, my dignity, my mind, my health, my sanity, and even at stages thought about ending my life.
I was comming home one night after staying out gambling after work and was involved in a car accident which nearly killed me also. I woke up from my problem for a few months, swearing i would give it up, but ALWAYS it seems to lure me back and i cant figure out why and how i end up back in the pu and casino. Its secuctive, and although most times if i try hard i can stay away, eventually it drags me back in and because i have not been for a while i seem to gamble more.
Gambling should be illegal. It's a vindictive, treacherous thing and the venues love it because it secures their income to be rich on our suffering, it's disgusting.
everyone needs to WAKE UP and never step foot near them again.
How many people have killed themselves over this?
how many lose their families?
how many lose everything they love?
how many cant put food on the table?
How many precious things in our life do we have to lose before we find the strength enough to give them up for good?
I think this goes to show that even if people want to give them up, sometimes they cant so obviously the pokies are too addictive. We have to unite in our tragedies and uninte with strength to support each other in abstaning from them for good!
I gambled again last night, and from today onwards im never doing it again.
Ive said this before but come hell or high water i have had enough, this time i am going to call gamblers help, and get counseilling, it makes me sick that these companies live like kings of my misery.
I cant keep letting myself down and i cant keep letting others down around me just to make someone else rich.
Beating yourself up wont help either, so just cut your loses and move forward with determination in your heart to beat this social disease.
please dont give up, you can do it.
hold on tight to what you love and try your heart out to look the other way when your driving past the pokie sign.
God bless, im not religious but im willing to draw on any faith and hope that's out there because there is always HOPE.
Dont kill yourself or kill your life for the pokies. Dont give it to them. Give it to yourself.
Hello, Im 27 years old and I have been playing online poker for the last 4 years or so. Even though I have managed to win quite a lot at times, I now feel that it's a 'mugs game' (to be blunt). I keep thinking that I can actually win consistently because it is poker and it has been proven to work for some, long term. After signing up on prob about 20 odd sites, i have realised that i'm actually down overall at every one! I think this comes as a reality check to voice this on here. These sites just want to rake you of your money. I strongly believe now that these online poker sites are also fixed to some degree so that the bad players can gain some 'luck' and hopefully in the sites' eyes, become hooked.there is huge luck involved as it is.
I realise that I have used it as a form of escape from my problems just like many other people. I have basically become addicted to the point that I play everyday and sit at home staring at my screen instead of seeing family and friends. Even right now, I can feel the pull to log on and have another game. I have just thrown away another $300.
My only saviour is that I feel I am strong willed enough to quit. I dont even know how much i have lost, but id say its just under $10,000. Its time to cut my losses. If this continues, I have no doubt that my losses could go into the tens of thousands.
I plan to post on here with my progress....Thank you
For me it was all about being a winner. After talking to a minister, I learnt to savour small wins in life. I had worked for bookies, race clubs and had several betting accounts - it was 6 days a week for me (no sunday betting in those days). Laugh at me if you will, but I thank God for getting me away from this curse 22 years ago.
For me it seem as though my gambling addiction has both crept up on me and smacked me all at once. It started in 2005. I was getting divorced and I had not been out of the house much...the local indian casino provided place to interact with people with out saying a word and offered the hope of endless riches. A quick $20 turned into $100, now 5 years later I spend $300-$500 a month probably more and have taken up bingo in addition to the slots. I find my find that my uncontrolable urge to gamble is preventing me from saving money to buy a house and causing me to avoid friends and family. It seems so simple...just dont go! I can not believe it has taken me so long to realize what I have become. I will be attending my first gamblers anonymous meeting today. The strange thing is, that finally accepting that my gambling is out of control is somewhat empowering, I need help understanding this and I am going to seek it!!
Why oh why do I do it.....I ask myself this when I walk out of the Pokies with 20 cents left in my purse.
I so want to stop and I try but I still go back and lose more money.
My gambling has made me lose all myself esteem and I feel like a loser because I am.
I also avoid friends and family.....with all the lame reasons of why I can't join them just for a coffee...no money real reason.
Now I need to tell my husband that I am in debt again !!
I hope I will survive the look of hurt and disgust that I have caused him yet again.
My mind is like a tumbler drier churning away day and night telling me how useless I am.
I am hooked on the pokies, it started about 20 years ago when I was playing the machines in tabaret, I turned a 20cent bet into $100.
Today I have 20 cents in my purse and lost a lot more than a $100.
It is so hard to stop [at the casino]. If you have a signature card and play enough you get free pokie credits for your next visit. So you get $10 in free pokie credits and will spend over $500 chasing that big win. Every day is difficult if you dont visit for a month the casino will try to lure you with free bingo, so you have 1500 people trying to win $200 to $2500 jackpots, do the maths, how many winners? (10 winners out of 1500)...
It is hard, every day is a struggle, but with the support of my good friends and family I will achieve my goal and be gamble free. I will start to take baby steps to reduce my debts and achieve my sanity back.
For some reason the times I bet too much on these damn pokies is when I can least afford to... I lost $500 last night which was meant to pay for my car insurance, and now I am broke.
I keep going back to the ATM, which for some reason are always conveniently placed. I think that they should ban ATM's from pubs and clubs. This is because if you are like me and hate losing, you get to a point where it feels like you have lost so much money already it appears to have no value. That is of course until you leave the building and drive home, contemplating what you have done, again!!!
... People like me are hurting and need to be saved from ourselves.
Aside from not gambling at all, I think the best thing people can do is make sure you pay ALL your bills (this includes going grocery shopping) BEFORE you even THINK ABOUT having a bet. Once you've paid all your bills and have food in the cupboard, there's probably not that much left over to lose anyway. When I stick to this I don't seem to have any trouble, but I find myself in strife when I gamble on pay day BEFORE having taken care of bills. It's very easy to get behind by $50 or $100 and become fixated on winning it back. Once it's gone, it's gone. It's not really yours to 'win back' anyway. This might sound a bit harsh but the fact that gambling is legal and so accessible....shows that we are quite an uncivilised society. A society that cared about its people wouldn't allow this to continue. A bit sad I know but I believe this to be spot on.
i have been gambling for about three years now..only on the pokies..what a devil in disguise they are! I started to gamble after a marriage separation and thought that i got the raw deal in the settlement. The pokies were paying out ok to start with and then i started to chase the losses and sometimes even pull out a big winner around 500 to 600 dollars... but the reality was that i was losing twice that to get the next big win. I am still gambling but have realised that i do have a problem and am looking for a way out of this hell. Reading the stories here and hearing what the addicted are saying rings true in my head right from the feeling of elation after a win and feeling bullet proof the next day only to give it all back and more that very night and walk out with nothing in my wallet at 4am and think about being at work and functioning by 8.30am ... very scary and i hate myself for losing and staying until i have lost everything...sometimes i think about ending the problem and that scares me too. often i walk away promising myself that i will never do that again ... but i am lost and i cant help it. good luck to you all who are facing this battle ... i hope i can win the ultimate jackpot and live free of this problem.
I have lost more than 100k over the last few years on online casinos. I hope I've now stopped after I had a 24k win a few weeks ago the went back the week later and lost the whole lot in 2 hours! All the time I was convincing myself that I could wipe out that 100k deficit!!!
I earn a very good salary but my gambling has put my once stable life into real jeopardy. My wife doesnt know about the gambling as I've been able to cover the loses with loans from a 'hidden' bank account but now I owe 60k and the stress is killing me.
The simple answer is that I regret that evening a few years ago when I first logged on, staked 500 and won 1000. I even cashed that in and treated the family but then went back, and back and back.
The casinos do everything they can to delay paying you out so that you will go back and play (Casino rewards in my case) and they delayed paying me for over a week - always having an excuse that they couldnt pay, and then I finish up gambling it all back!
Please listen to me - don't be tempted - if you don't start you never have to quit!
I'm a partner of a long term gambling addict (16+ years) - we have only been together 12 months... and its been a living, emotional hell. Work, family, friends and a great gambling counsellor have been my saving graces especially when I got to the point where I just couldn't cope any longer by keeping his gambling a secret and bottled up inside.
I'm at a point now where I almost no longer care what my partner does with his money or how many hours he wastes at the Tabaret and this makes me really sad to think someone I love can be so self destructive and that for me to get through my day, I have to disassociate myself at a certain level from him - unfortunately love isn't always enough when so much damage is done and the trust is gone. I am so over the excuses, the promises, the lies, the stealing and all the things we both miss out on as a couple. His life is this ongoing drama from pay day to pay day - all focused around feeding his addiction. He's been diagnosed with mild Bipolar Type 2 - apparently this is very common with people with an addiction problem and can be easily treated with medication, yet he refuses to take it. Gambling is seen as a manic (heightened/intense) episode, usually followed by feelings of regret.
The insanity of it all is like a snowball. I struggle saying no when he asks for money yet I've learnt there is no benefit in giving in. Nothing changes. I have to constnatly find my inner strength to stay true to what is good for me, to focus on keeping me well and to have a life for me outside of his addiction problems. So, so much of my time has been spent worry about my partner, worrying about the bills and where he was that I had forgotten to take care of myself. I had to let all this go and let him own his actions so I can be free emotionally of the pain his gambling causes me - like cutting the string of a balloon.
I woke up the other day to find that I had lost $20,000 in less than 12 months on a combination of poker machines and the stock market. When I say I woke up, it was actually my wife who has woken me up to this. I make the decisions to gamble, I am the one who is out of control. Why couldn't I see it? Why can't I admit it?
Why am I still doing it? I DON"T KNOW, but I know I am sick with it.
I had a brush with the pokies about 10 years ago, which cost $'000's, but not as many as I've lost now. I got back on track but cannot for the life of me gain control at this time.
Why? What was the trigger? How do I recognise it now?
I feel better just writing this, but is this just a short term thing? Who knows?
Good luck to you all, I am now doing something about my problems.
Post new comment
Comment Rules
People who want to post comments on problemgambling.vic.gov.au are going to have to follow certain rules. Not all forums are like that, but this one is.
No swearing at all, no insulting individuals or groups, no libel, slander, no lying, no fabricating, no ethnic slurs, no religious bigotry, no threats of any kind, no vulgar humour and no insulting comparisons. Discourse and debate is encouraged but all comments should be polite and civil. This is a public space so please behave and write accordingly.
The Department of Justice reserves the right to remove posts it deems break any of the rules or the spirit of the rules and reserves the right to block individuals from commenting. Language filtering programs will be used to block certain words as will human moderation of all comments too.
Comments should be limited to the topic of the content above. This is not a place for private conversations, no matter how harmless.
Very important: if you see a comment that you feel is inappropriate, let us know by clicking on the 'comment complaint' or 'report this complaint' button.