Parents
When a parent has an issue with their gambling
When a parent has an issue with their gambling it can change the way that those in the family feel about each other and themselves. It can also change the way you live.
Young people might experience:
- Missing out on activities such as sport, school excursions, camps or music lessons
- Not being able to buy new clothes or shoes when they're needed
- Not having enough food to eat
- Having to take on more of the "adult" responsibilities in the home, such as looking after younger children
- Increased arguments and tension in the home
- Family violence
- Family breakdown
- Homelessness
Young people might feel:
- A loss of trust because of lies, secrets and broken promises
- Unhappy because of arguments about gambling and money problems
- Loss of self-esteem
- Different to friends or isolated from them
- Ashamed, angry, lonely, powerless, guilty
What help is available?
It can be hard when someone close to you has a problem with gambling. Sometimes you will know that the cause of the problem is gambling, or you might just have a sense that "something is wrong", but you're not quite sure what to say or do about it.
You could think about talking to:
- A friend or family member
- Your doctor
- A teacher or student welfare coordinator
- A youth worker or social worker at a community health centre
- Kids Helpline: 1800 551 800 FREECALL, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week
- Gambler's Help: 1800 858 858 FREECALL, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week
- Gambling Help online, at www.gamblinghelponline.org.au, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week
If someone in your family has a gambling problem, remember:
- You are not to blame for their behaviour
- The gambling is the problem, not the person
- You can't force your family member to stop
- You can tell someone you trust about what's happening. This is not betraying your family
- You can help by saying "No" to gambling and lying, and "Yes" I care about you
- You have the right to feel safe
- You have the right to feel emotionally and financially secure
Gambler's Help is free, confidential and won't appear on your home phone bill. Call 1800 56 789 or visit www.gamblinghelponline.org.au for help and advice now.
Rate this page
Comments Disclaimer
You're now in the public comments section of this page. Please do NOT post personal questions for Gambler's Help service professionals as they do not moderate or reply to questions here. This content comes from other people visiting the site and cannot be vouched for. Also please do NOT give feedback on the site here. A reminder: By using this Web site you are accepting the terms of the Department of Justice Privacy statement.
Comments
My mum has a gambling problem she has for years now and has got herself into debt. I have tried to talk about it but it ends up in an arguement. Us kids have got her to go to gamblers help which did help for awhile and I don't think she is going as much but I know she still spends more than she should and can afford to. I am not really sure what else I can do.
My mom has a problem with gambling. It started out in the legal way - share market trading. Her broker allowed her to trade on margin - meaning she borrowed money to speculate on the stock market. She has no understanding of risk - and loved to bet on the penny stocks. Initially she made a lot of money then she lost it all. I bailed her out in a big way by selling my investment property to cover her losses and to save the family house. She promised to stop but refused to sign any legal paperwork to give me power of attorney or to transfer the family home to my name. Bad mistake. Initially she was ok. Then she went overseas for a family wedding. One of her brothers, my uncles took her to a casino for fun. It went downhill from then on. She still refuses to admit she has a problem and does not want to see a counselor or psychiatrist - claiming that's for "crazy people only". I am now at the point of simply abandoning her and letting the inevitable happen. She refuses to spend any money to repair the family home - but is quite happy to lose $1000 a day at the casino. I don't understand how she could have degenerated so badly - she rants and complains bitterly when I buy free range eggs or quality meat or go on a nice holiday. But she doesn't see her absurd sense of logic. I give up.
My mum has a gambling problem. She takes money from me and my brothers and sister to go out, claiming that she has no money for fuel for work. I guess the thing that hurts the most is the constant lying, even when i have confronted her about her lies she will not back down. I feel like the adult in our relationship always wanting to know where she has been and what she spends the money on.
Only me and my sister seem to care enough to want her to change, which is hard because she wont do anything because she wont admit there is a problem.
I feel that she doesnt care about me because no matter how much concern or worry i express nothing seems to be changing.
my parents have a gambling addiction. They don't tell me but i know. It started a year ago but before that we were a happy family. It was perfect. Now I hate my life. They're out right now. They've been out every night. Tonight was the first time I actually confronted them about their addiction. Managed to stall them for 30 minutes but then they left. Just needed to express my feelings in a safe manner. I have no one else to turn to.
Post new comment
Comment Rules
People who want to post comments on problemgambling.vic.gov.au are going to have to follow certain rules. Not all forums are like that, but this one is.
No swearing at all, no insulting individuals or groups, no libel, slander, no lying, no fabricating, no ethnic slurs, no religious bigotry, no threats of any kind, no vulgar humour and no insulting comparisons. Discourse and debate is encouraged but all comments should be polite and civil. This is a public space so please behave and write accordingly.
The Department of Justice reserves the right to remove posts it deems break any of the rules or the spirit of the rules and reserves the right to block individuals from commenting. Language filtering programs will be used to block certain words as will human moderation of all comments too.
Comments should be limited to the topic of the content above. This is not a place for private conversations, no matter how harmless.
Very important: if you see a comment that you feel is inappropriate, let us know by clicking on the 'comment complaint' or 'report this complaint' button.